The Definitive BE Story Archive

The Overflowing Bra

WANK Magazine #2
I swore I wasn't going to write this, but then I had an idea...

Mike buys an issue of WANK Magazine, and meets Alyssa, who has a very unique ability.
Average Scores:

Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 4

This one, along with its unintended predecessor are fantastic.
It's true; sometimes I'm in the mood for a lengthy novel (see "Compounding Interest", I am blanking on the author) but other times something shorter just fits the bill. What you've done here is to take a well-crafted fantasy and put it in a small space, as opposed to just being brief. Well done!

Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 5

Very nice, sir! Both of your stories showed what a 'flash' story should be. Please keep up with the writing and maybe even this series. Oh, and you have some of the more original 'expansion' descriptions out there!

Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

I have to agree, this was incredibly well written. I'm not really all that into GTS, but this was way better than your first... probably that whole 'out-of-control' aspect.

I love how your characters don't waste time on technobabble or anything; they just wave their hand: 'magic.' Too many stories worry about setting up a believable framework for the transformation and fall too short of the mark. I guarantee this story is going to be spinning in my head all day now.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

Once again, simple and to the point. Great work, humblefool.

As Paul Gerard put it, if this is you "not really wanting to write" then I definitely want to see what you will write when you DO.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

Pure awesome. Want more.

Paul Gerard
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

If that’s what you write when you swear not to write, the all I have to say is:
You, Sir, rock. You absolutely rock.

Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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BE Description (Detail, quantity, quality)
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Characters (Descriptions, likeability)
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Technical Quality (Writing style, grammar, etc.)
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